The Endless Search for Self Esteem

We search endlessly for self esteem.  Endlessly desiring to finally feel good about ourselves.  And I am unsure if we ever arrive.

For many the pursuit of feeling good about oneself can lead to an even more endless pursuit to find more and more distracting entertainments.  A short term fix of an experiential high.   Don’t feel good about yourself?  Find a parade, a carival with lights and noise (and of course funnel cake!:-)) THEN we will feel good about ourselves.

For those who crave entertainment … and funnel cake … it doesn’t work beyond the slivers of times when the entertainment briefly overshadows the consistent, dull drumbeat of self doubt.  And then there we are, again. In all our self loathing wonder.

I think this.  I think the question of self esteem must eventually die.  Must eventually go.  That does not mean the answer lies in misery, a misery that can be just as addictive as entertainment.

And how does the question die?  It dies over time, over a long time, as we settle into the deepest sanctuary of who we are in God. For me, I find that in stillness. From a center or Center that just is.

And in some odd, I-don’t-have-words-for-it way, I suspect that we find it as we look at others that way … right to the center/ Center of their being and so ours. Seeing beyond their doubts and confusions. Resisting the understandable urge to distract them with the shiny trinkets of our culture as a false fix.  And simply see.  Simply see them.  Simply see them as an angel.  Simply see them as they are.  Made in the image and likeness of God.

It will save you a lot of money in carnival tickets.


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