A Wedding Charge

Two words, “finding” and “being” – a world of difference between.   We do first “find” each other – our beloved.  Marriage celebrates that finding and that sense of being found.  It also initiates a change.  The change is from “finding” the perfect partner to a promise of “being” the perfect partner.

One minister penned the words “Until we love, we really do not even know who we are.”  Note the language carefully – it is about the fact that when we love, we finally come to know who we really are. There are incredibly deep implications for the two of you, for all of us.

We exist within a culture largely concerned with being loved, – with celebrating self-advancement, self-esteem, and self-sufficiency.  Odd to say but these are not the three keys of marriage.  Imagine seeing marriage as merely a way of getting ahead?  Imagine holding it as way of building our ego’s need for affirmation?  Imagine the same with self-sufficiency?

How then do we learn to really love, learning to be the perfect partner?  No easy answers here.  It is simple work but it is work you can enter into with great hope, with great promise, and with great joy.

See marriage, like all things of great spiritual value, is an invitation into a larger story.  Our lives begin where our lives begin – as individuals.  We take root in one place long enough to grow deep.  And the time arrives – from growing deep – that we start growing out.  It is the invitation from my story, to our story.

God absolutely will always invite you to that larger story.  As you cross each threshold in your life together – you will hear that voice – a voice that calmly gives time for rest and peace and then quietly calls you – volume no louder than the beating of your own heart – to the next, to the larger story.  Your job will be to answer.  Life then moves from gazing at each other with the fawn like eyes of first love to the eyes of the explorer – looking out from the same place, together, towards an unfolding and as yet unknown future.  Travel.

Loving couples know how to take on that future in the grace and peace that allows for the “sacred space in between.”  They allow their partner the space to grow and the togetherness to always find safety and peace.  In those endeavors we come more and more to reflect the love of God.  We start to experience the love of God.  “God is now working in us – as us.”    That is part of the sacredness of marriage – of conjugial love

Crazy stuff – but your married life together will be nothing more in a sense then to continually re-awaken to what you already have.  And oh do you have “it.”  All of us here are blessed to know the two of you.  We know the joy and laughter of Brie.  We know the focus and commitment of Rich.  Wrap yourself today in the love and joy of those gathered here today.  Wrap yourself today in the love so apparent in each other eyes.  Wrap yourself today in God’s love.  Imagine with wonder what lies ahead as your travel forward.

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